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Woman asks if mediation or a court battle is best in her divorce

Few people would argue that a woman who recently asked for advice from columnist Amy Dickinson is not justified in seeking divorce. After all, the woman writes that her husband of more than 20 years has spent more than $20,000 on "escorts." And he also gave her an STD.

The woman writes that she is torn between two choices to pursue in a divorce: a bruising court battle or mediation that will save money and be less public.

Many people would certainly understand why a spouse might choose litigation in this person's situation. She might be forgiven for wanting a measure of vengeance. The dictionary says it best when it defines vengeance as "punishment inflicted or retribution exacted for an injury or wrong."

But in her response to the wronged spouse, Dickinson makes a couple of points worth consideration. First, there must be a legal point on which the couple disagrees in order for there to be a court battle.

While it might not be difficult to find disagreement (distribution of assets; spousal support; and child custody all come to mind as common points of disagreement in divorces), differences might best be resolved in mediation. After all, as the letter-writer notes, mediation tends to be less expensive than litigation.

And differences can be worked out more quickly and less painfully with a mediator than in public court hearings.

You can contact a Butler County family law attorney experienced as a mediator to discuss how the mediation process might benefit you.

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